8. Self Care for Entrepreneurs: Practical Strategies to Protect Your Mental Health While Building a Business with Dr. Aprile Andelle
- May 9, 2023
- 14 min read
Updated: 6 hours ago
Running a business can be incredibly fulfilling.
It can also mean you're the CEO, marketer, salesperson, customer-service department, accountant, content creator, problem solver and—depending on the day—the person Googling why is my website suddenly doing THAT?
Then add parenting, relationships, a house, finances, appointments, goals and all the normal life stuff that doesn't stop just because you decided to become an entrepreneur.
It's very easy for self care for entrepreneurs to become the thing we promise ourselves we'll get around to once everything else is finished.
Except everything is never finished.
That's why I wanted to have this conversation with licensed psychotherapist Dr. Aprile Andelle on Go Get Great.
We talked about business owners' mental health, therapy, relationships, parenting, emotional regulation and, most importantly, what self-care actually looks like when you have a full life and aren't interested in adding another impossible routine to your to-do list.
Because self-care isn't necessarily a bubble bath.
It isn't a reward you earn after you've completely exhausted yourself.
And it definitely isn't one more thing you need to do perfectly.
Sometimes the best strategies for self care are simply learning to recognize what you're feeling, understand what you need and give yourself permission to do something about it.
A quick note: This article shares educational information from my conversation with Dr. Aprile Andelle and my own experiences as an entrepreneur and mom. It isn't a substitute for individualized mental-health care. If you're struggling significantly or concerned about your mental health, please connect with an appropriate healthcare or mental-health professional.
If we haven’t met yet, I’m Brittany — a mom of seven, home renovation enthusiast, an Amazon bestselling author, podcast host, and a business owner who’s all about keeping life real and doable. I know firsthand how messy, beautiful, and overwhelming motherhood can feel, and I share from that space of “in the trenches” right alongside you.
Here, you’ll find encouragement, practical tips, and honest conversations about balancing family, work, and your own sense of self. My hope is that you’ll walk away feeling a little lighter, a little more seen, and a whole lot more equipped to create a life that works for you and your family. Follow me on Instagram @brittanynmiller_ for more.
Now let's dive in!
Table of Contents
Why Self Care for Entrepreneurs Matters
Entrepreneurship can be exciting, creative and incredibly meaningful. It can also be lonely.
When you work for yourself, there isn't always someone sitting beside you saying: "Hey, you've been staring at that spreadsheet for four hours. Maybe go eat something."
You're making decisions.
Managing uncertainty.
Thinking about money.
Trying to find clients.
Serving existing clients.
Planning what comes next.
And often doing it without the built-in support structure you'd have in a traditional workplace.
That's why conversations around business owners' mental health matter.
Being capable and independent doesn't mean you should have to carry everything alone.
One of the things Dr. Aprile emphasized during our conversation is that self-reliance and self-care are not opposites.
You can trust yourself.
You can be ambitious.
You can build something big.
And you can still need rest, connection, support or therapy.
In fact, taking care of yourself is part of taking care of your business. You aren't separate from the business you're trying to build.
If you're exhausted, overwhelmed or constantly operating in survival mode, eventually that affects your decision-making, relationships, creativity and ability to actually enjoy what you've created.
Redefining What Self-Care Actually Means
When someone says "self-care," what do you picture?
Bubble bath?
Wine?
Chocolate?
Spa day?
Candles and a robe that apparently no toddler has ever spilled something on? 😂
Those things absolutely can be self-care if you enjoy them.
But they aren't the definition.
Dr. Aprile described self-care as anything that helps fill you back up, renew you, refresh you or bring your emotional state closer to balance.
And I think that definition is so much more useful.
Because the key word is: You.
Maybe you feel restored after going for a walk.
Maybe you need to read.
Maybe you want music blasting while you clean the kitchen.
Maybe you pray.
Maybe you call a friend.
Maybe you need complete silence and for nobody to say your name for approximately 20 minutes. 😂
What helps me isn't automatically what helps you, because I am NOT a drink wine in the bubble bath kind of girl but I know a lot of women are and that's okay.
Your strategies for self care should reflect your personality, life, responsibilities and current season—not what looks good on Pinterest. Dr. Aprile and I share more about this in our full episode of the Go Get Great podcast, which you can tune into here:
Why Business Owners' Mental Health Deserves More Attention
Entrepreneurs are often celebrated for qualities like resilience, independence and hustle. Those traits can absolutely help you build a business.
They can also make it really easy to ignore when you're struggling.
You tell yourself:
I'll figure it out.
I'll push through.
It'll calm down after this launch.
I just need to get through this month.
And sometimes that works.
Until you're six months into saying exactly the same thing.
Business stress can come from:
Financial uncertainty
Inconsistent revenue
Difficult clients or customers
Working alone
Constant decision-making
Social-media pressure
Comparing yourself to competitors
Trying to balance family and business
Feeling responsible for absolutely everything
Never really feeling "off"
Self-care can't make those realities disappear.
A 15-minute walk isn't going to magically fix your cash flow.
But protecting your mental health can help you approach difficult circumstances with more clarity instead of constantly reacting from exhaustion, panic or overwhelm.
And that matters.
Start With the Emotion, Not the Solution
One of my favourite practical ideas from this conversation was incredibly simple: Before trying to fix how you feel, identify what you're actually feeling.
We tend to say things like:
"My partner is driving me crazy."
"My kids won't stop touching me."
"My business is stressing me out."
Those are situations. They're not emotions.
Underneath them might be:
Frustration
Anxiety
Exhaustion
Loneliness
Resentment
Sadness
Anger
Fear
Overwhelm
Disappointment
And those different emotions might need completely different kinds of support.
If I'm exhausted, the answer might be rest.
If I'm lonely, another night alone in a bubble bath probably isn't what I need. I might need to call someone.
If I'm overwhelmed by my business, watching Netflix may give me a break—but asking for help, simplifying a project or changing a deadline might actually address what's creating the stress.
So before asking: "What should I do for self-care?"
Try asking: "What am I actually feeling right now?"
A Simple 3-Step Self-Care Check-In
Dr. Aprile shared a really practical exercise that you can do when you're feeling disconnected or overwhelmed.
Step 1: Name three emotions
Not circumstances.
Actual emotions.
Maybe: "I'm frustrated, anxious and exhausted."
Step 2: Let those feelings exist
You don't need to immediately talk yourself out of them.
You're allowed to acknowledge: "Yeah. I'm really overwhelmed today."
That doesn't mean you have to stay there.
It just means you're not adding shame on top of an already difficult feeling.
Step 3: Ask what could help a little
Not: "How do I completely fix my life before bedtime?"
Try: "What could help me feel 5% better by the end of today?"
That might be a walk.
A coffee.
Ten minutes alone.
Calling a friend.
Cancelling something.
Asking your partner for a hug.
Going to bed early.
Five percent counts and will help you be a better version of yourself tomorrow, in your business and with your family.
Practical Strategies for Self Care
One thing I really don't want this article to become is another giant list of 75 things you're supposedly meant to squeeze into your morning routine.
Because that's not particularly helpful for an entrepreneur who already feels stretched (I say speaking from experience).
Instead, think of self-care strategies in categories.
Physical self-care
Support your body. That might include:
Sleeping
Eating regularly
Drinking water
Walking
Stretching
Working out
Breathwork
Yoga
Resting when you're sick
Emotional self-care
Create somewhere for your emotions to go. That could mean:
Journaling
Therapy
Talking to someone you trust
Naming your emotions
Crying
Setting a boundary
Giving yourself permission to say no
Social self-care
Sometimes what you need isn't alone time. You need people.
Try:
Calling a friend
Going for coffee
Joining a networking group
Spending intentional time with your partner
Finding other entrepreneurs who understand your experience
That last one can be particularly valuable when you're self-employed.
There are certain things your non-business-owner friends may love you through—but simply won't fully understand.
Mental self-care
Give your brain something different to focus on.
Read.
Do a puzzle.
Watch something funny.
Listen to music.
Play a game.
Learn something simply because you're interested in it and not because it has a measurable ROI. 😅
Practical self-care
This category doesn't get talked about nearly enough. Sometimes self-care is:
Hiring the cleaner
Ordering groceries
Outsourcing something in your business
Moving a deadline
Automating a task
Asking your partner to handle dinner
Saying no to a project you don't have capacity for
Self-care doesn't always look relaxing.
Sometimes it looks like making tomorrow easier. Recognizing this has been a huge thing for me, it's shifted my mindset and helped me feel more relaxed and grounded when I practice self-care in this way.
Examples of Self Care Strategies You Can Actually Use
Dr. Aprile shared several things she personally uses as part of her own self-care toolkit.
She walks regularly—often in the morning—and sometimes combines the walk with calling a friend, praying or simply taking a breather.
She reads.
She watches shows.
She does puzzles, solitaire and memory games.
She listens to music, particularly Afrobeats.
And she loves dancing—ballroom, Latin dance, salsa, bachata, tango, waltz, merengue, Afro dance and kizomba.
She also loves travelling and connecting with different people and cultures.
And yes, sometimes she likes a bubble bath too.
That's what I love about these examples of self care strategies. There's no theme.
They're just things that make her feel more like herself. That's what your list should look like too.
Maybe you love gardening.
Maybe you train puppies.
Maybe you read mystery novels.
Maybe you bake.
Maybe you're weirdly delighted by organizing a closet.
It doesn't need to make sense to anyone else so long as you enjoy it! Personally, I love reading, doing puzzles and playing board games with Gray and the kids. I even share some of our favourite family board games and board games for date night in these two blogs posts.
Self Care for Parents Who Are Also Building a Business
Add parenthood to entrepreneurship and things get even more interesting.
Young children have a particular talent for needing you at precisely the moment you thought you had five minutes to yourself. 😂
Sleep gets interrupted.
Schedules change.
Someone gets sick.
Childcare falls through.
And sometimes you realize you can't remember the last time you did something that was entirely for you.
This is one reason I think self care for entrepreneurs who are also parents has to be realistic. You're probably not disappearing to a wellness retreat every Thursday, or even once a year in certain seasons of your life.
But you might be able to:
Ask your partner to take over bedtime
Read after the kids go to sleep
Take a walk while someone else handles dinner
Sit alone in the car for five minutes
Schedule childcare occasionally
Protect one work-free evening
Ask for help before you're completely depleted
Dr. Aprile also made an important point about children: They're listening. Especially toddlers.
They might mysteriously become completely unable to hear you when you say, "Please put your shoes on."
But they're absorbing how we communicate, how we handle stress, how we repair after hard moments and how we treat ourselves.
Practicing self-care isn't only about what it gives us.
It also models something for our children:
People are allowed to have needs.
People can ask for help.
Emotions are normal.
Rest isn't a failure.
Remember that the next time you try to talk yourself out of self-care, there is always time to look after you, and when you do, not only does everyone around you benefits but you model great skills for your kids.
Stop Expecting Yourself to Handle Everything Alone
Entrepreneurs can get particularly attached to the idea that being independent means being able to figure everything out ourselves.
You started the business. You're the boss. Surely you should be able to handle it.
Except that's not actually how healthy businesses—or healthy people—work.
Support can come from:
Your partner
Friends
Family
Employees
Contractors
Coaches
Peer communities
Healthcare providers
Therapists
Being supported doesn't make you less capable. It gives you more capacity to use your strengths where they're actually needed.
When Self-Care Isn't Enough: Could Therapy Help?
Self-care strategies are valuable. But they're not always enough.
Therapy isn't only something you seek when you've hit a crisis point.
It can also be a space to understand yourself better, develop coping skills, navigate relationships and get support before things become unbearable.
Dr. Aprile suggested paying attention when you notice persistent changes such as:
Difficulty coping with everyday responsibilities
Ongoing sadness, anger, irritability or anxiety
Significant sleep changes
Appetite changes
Exhaustion
Isolation
Losing interest in things you previously enjoyed
Feeling stuck
Relationship conflict that feels difficult to navigate
Increasing reliance on substances to cope
Physical symptoms that appear alongside significant stress
Sometimes our bodies tell us things before our brains are willing to admit them.
Persistent exhaustion.
Sleep disruption.
Feeling physically unwell.
Even small stress responses can be signals worth noticing.
And there's a really simple idea I liked from Dr. Aprile: If you've started wondering, "Do I need therapy?" That question itself may be worth exploring.
You don't need to prove you're struggling "enough" before you're allowed support.
If you're in immediate danger or thinking about harming yourself or someone else, seek urgent professional or emergency support in your location rather than relying on self-care strategies alone.
How to Find the Right Therapist
Finding a therapist can feel like one more overwhelming task when you're already struggling. A few places to start include:
Your family doctor or primary-care provider
Your insurance or benefits provider
Recommendations from people you trust
School counselling resources for students
Local mental-health organizations
Virtual or online therapy providers
Online therapy can be particularly helpful for busy entrepreneurs and parents because it removes travel time and may make scheduling easier.
But finding a therapist isn't necessarily the same as finding your therapist. Fit matters. Dr. Aprile recommends considering questions such as:
Do I feel respected?
Do I feel heard?
Can I imagine being honest with this person?
Do they understand the issues I want help with?
Am I clear on their fees, scheduling and process?
Therapy itself can be uncomfortable. You're discussing personal things. You're looking at patterns you may have avoided.
So feeling nervous doesn't automatically mean a therapist is wrong for you. But you should still feel safe, respected and supported.
Many therapists offer introductory or discovery calls, which can be a good opportunity to see whether the relationship feels like a fit.
How Therapy Can Improve Relationships and Communication
Dr. Aprile is a licensed marriage and family therapist, so a lot of our conversation naturally came back to relationships.
And one of the things I found especially interesting is that therapy isn't necessarily someone giving you answers.
Good therapy often involves questions.
Listening.
Looking at patterns.
Understanding how one person's actions influence another person's response.
That means individual therapy can sometimes change an entire family dynamic.
If you change how you communicate, manage your tone, set boundaries or respond during conflict, the people around you may start responding differently too.
Dr. Aprile described this idea as almost like family therapy for one.
Listening is a skill
Something else we tend to assume we're naturally good at? Listening.
Apparently therapists can take entire courses on it. Which makes me feel slightly better about the rest of us occasionally getting it wrong. 😂
Small responses matter.
"I hear you."
"That makes sense."
"Mm-hmm."
Those tiny acknowledgements tell another person: I'm here. I'm paying attention. What you're saying matters.
And that's useful whether you're talking to your partner, your child, your employee or a client.
What about intimacy?
We also talked about sex therapy.
One of the most important takeaways was that intimacy problems aren't always really about sex.
Stress, parenting, difficult communication, illness, pain, hormone changes, past experiences and emotional disconnection can all affect intimacy.
Therapy can create space to talk about those things more openly. The goal isn't to force a particular type or amount of intimacy.
It's greater communication, safety, connection and understanding.
The Emotional Skills We Should Have Learned Earlier
At one point in our conversation, Dr. Aprile talked about the things she wishes children learned earlier.
And I couldn't help thinking: Yes. Why DID we learn long division before learning what to do when we're overwhelmed? 😂
She mentioned skills like:
Building and maintaining friendships
Managing anxiety
Handling anger
Communicating needs
Caring for other people
Basic etiquette and respect
Understanding emotions
These aren't "soft" skills.
They're life skills.
They're also business skills.
Entrepreneurs need to communicate.
Set boundaries.
Manage disappointment.
Deal with conflict.
Ask for help.
Build relationships.
Handle uncertainty.
So if nobody taught you those things particularly well when you were eight, you're not too late. Learning them now is part of self-care too.
Building Your Own Self-Care Toolkit
One of Dr. Aprile's biggest reminders was that many of us simply don't have enough coping strategies.
We have one or two.
Then when those don't work, we're stuck.
Maybe your current list is:
Scroll Instagram.
Eat something.
Work harder.
Eventually collapse.
We can probably do better. 😂
Think of your self-care strategies like a toolkit. You want several options because different situations require different tools.
A walk may help when you're restless.
A conversation might help when you're lonely.
A night alone may help when you're overstimulated.
Therapy may help when you're stuck in a pattern you can't untangle yourself.
Music might help when you need your mood shifted.
A practical solution might help when you're drowning in responsibilities.
The question isn't: "What's the best self-care strategy?"
It's: "What would support me in this particular moment?"
Self Care for Entrepreneurs FAQs
Why is self care important for entrepreneurs?
Entrepreneurs often manage uncertainty, decision fatigue, financial pressure, isolation and long working hours. Self-care can help support mental and emotional wellbeing and create a more sustainable way to build a business. Taking care of yourself isn't separate from taking care of your company because your capacity directly affects the way you work and make decisions.
What are some good strategies for self care?
Useful strategies can include movement, sleep, nourishing meals, time with friends, therapy, journaling, music, hobbies, rest, boundaries, asking for help and reducing unnecessary responsibilities. The most effective strategy depends on what you're actually feeling and needing at the time.
What are examples of self care strategies for busy entrepreneurs?
Simple examples include taking a 15-minute walk, calling a friend, setting a clear end to your workday, outsourcing a task, taking a lunch break away from your computer, listening to music, reading, booking therapy or intentionally protecting time that isn't connected to your business.
How can business owners protect their mental health?
Start by recognizing that mental health deserves attention before reaching a crisis point. Build boundaries around work, maintain relationships outside the business, pay attention to changes in mood or behaviour, create multiple coping strategies and seek professional support when stress or emotional difficulties become persistent or difficult to manage.
How do I know whether I need self-care or therapy?
Self-care can support everyday stress and emotional wellbeing. Therapy may be particularly helpful when you're struggling to cope, symptoms are persistent, relationships or daily functioning are being affected, or the strategies you normally use aren't helping. You don't need to wait until you're in crisis to speak with a professional.
What are realistic self care strategies for entrepreneur moms?
Keep them small and flexible. Ask for help with childcare or household responsibilities, protect small pockets of alone time, take walks, maintain friendships, outsource where possible and notice when you need rest versus connection. Self-care doesn't need to take hours to count.
Final Thoughts: Sustainable Success Includes You
Entrepreneurs love talking about sustainability.
Sustainable marketing.
Sustainable growth.
Sustainable systems.
But your business isn't truly sustainable if you aren't.
You don't need the world's most impressive morning routine.
You don't need to love bubble baths.
And you definitely don't need to wait until you're completely burned out before you're allowed to take yourself seriously.
Start with the emotion. Ask what you need. Do one thing that helps. Build your toolkit over time. Ask for support.
And if you need professional help, get it before you convince yourself you haven't struggled "enough" to deserve it.
The best self care for entrepreneurs isn't necessarily glamorous.
Sometimes it's a walk.
Sometimes it's a boundary.
Sometimes it's outsourcing.
Sometimes it's therapy.
And sometimes it's admitting that you are a person worth taking care of too.
To learn more from Dr. Aprile Andelle, you can explore her mental-health resources and therapy services on her website. Her Keep Depression Away checklist is also available as an additional resource.
Episode References
Keep Depression Away Checklist Book a discovery call with Aprile *Use discount code GGGreat2023
Connect with Aprile
Come say hi!
00:00 Intro
1:55 Education and Motivation
6:43 Primary school teachings
7:50 Sex therapy
10:53 Marriage and family therapy
14:35 The toddlers are always listening
15:20 The pandemics impact on therapy
18:19 Entrepreneurs and mental health
20:10 Redefine self-care
25:10 Helping parents with self-care
30:34 Do I need therapy?
37:40 How to seek out therapy
45:00 Therapy advice
47:23 Self-care suggestions
53:01 Aprile's favourite travel destination
59:51 Wrap-up
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