1. Leadership and Parenting: The Surprising Skills That Help You Build a Business (Without Losing Yourself) With Kristina Schmitt
- Mar 21, 2023
- 14 min read
Updated: Sep 1
If you’ve ever woken up on a Monday feeling capable—then immediately thought, “Okay, but what if I can’t handle running a business on top of being a mom?”—you’re not the first, and you won't be the last. Kristina and I have both experienced this as small business owners and that's what we're talking about on the podcast today.
Here’s the surprising part: leadership and parenting aren’t as different as we’re told they are. The skills you practice in motherhood—communication, trust, routines, accountability, emotional regulation, and relationship-building—are the same skills that make leadership work. And when you start seeing the connection, something shifts. You stop treating business like a totally new identity… and you start realizing you already have the foundation.
In this article, we’ll explore that connection through the story of Kristina Schmidt, a facilitator and coach with the Achievement Center who helps businesses improve results through people development—leadership training, coaching, and culture development. She built her leadership identity first in corporate manufacturing (as a plant manager), and then discovered that parenthood didn’t derail her leadership—it sharpened it.
Whether you’re a busy mom, a solo entrepreneur, or someone trying to “switch from mom mode to CEO mode,” you’ll find practical takeaways here: how to build trust, how to give (and receive) feedback, how to structure your day, and how to create habits that actually stick.
Before we dive in, let me introduce myself. I’m Brittany, an online marketing strategist for female entrepreneurs. I teach women how to make their entrepreneurial dreams a reality through smart, actionable marketing strategies that get them seen, loved, and paid. Whether you’re eager to DIY your way to success or hire professionals to help you along the way–my goal is to make sure you walk away with the clarity you need to see the results you desire and build a life you love.
Meet Kristina Schmitt
Kristina Schmitt is a leadership coach, trainer, and business owner who helps leaders build stronger businesses by first becoming stronger, healthier leaders themselves. After beginning her career as a Lean Manufacturing consultant, Kristina realized that lasting change required more than implementing the right tools—it required creating cultures built around coaching, psychological safety, and continuous improvement.
Drawing on her own journey from chronically stressed leader and mom to a more balanced business owner, she takes a holistic approach to leadership development that considers the wellbeing of the leader, their team, and the business as a whole.
Table or Contents
The big mindset shift: you’re already a leader
When Kristina was asked the question “mom or business—what came first?” her answer was clear: leadership came first.
She spent many years in manufacturing, ultimately stepping into a general manager-style role running an automotive manufacturing facility. That kind of leadership is intense. You’re responsible for people, outcomes, and the environment your team operates inside. You can’t “wing it” for long.
Then she became a parent. And she realized something almost immediate: the work of parenting felt strangely similar to the work of leading.
Her realization wasn’t just “they’re both hard.” It was more specific:
Both require relationship-building (not just tasks).
Both require consistency through routines and expectations.
Both involve behavior change over time, not instant transformation.
Both are about developing people into “effective adults” (whether that means employees or the next generation).
And that’s a key point for leadership and parenting: you don’t need to “become someone else” to be a business owner. You need to recognize the leadership you already practice daily—and translate it into your business systems. Kristina talks about this more in our full conversation which you can listen to here:
Leadership & Parenting: What motherhood taught her that leadership needed anyway
Kristina described her transition into entrepreneurship as gradual. She didn’t jump headfirst. She was pregnant with her second child and was already in a moment of frustration and wanting “more”—more of the kind of leadership work she enjoyed most: developing people, improving culture, helping organizations implement changes.
She began working with the Achievement Center around 2021. At that point, she was able to focus on leadership through people development—leadership training, coaching, and culture development—especially the behavior change component that makes continuous improvement actually stick.
But what truly made the connection land was how often parenting mirrored the skills she was teaching at work.
Relationship is the root system (not the “nice to have”)
Kristina emphasized that it all comes down to trust and relationships.
In her words, leadership isn’t effective unless trust is present. You can’t build a real relationship with someone if you don’t believe they can do the thing you’re asking of them—or if you don’t believe the relationship is worth investing in.
She even connected this to a parenting book she was reading: Good Inside by Dr. Becky Kennedy. The premise resonated because it frames parenting as a process of trusting the good inside people—and then building the environment and communication that bring that good forward.
That logic doesn’t stay trapped in the home. It’s the same logic that makes leadership training work inside companies:
When people trust you, they engage rather than resist.
When they feel understood, they’re more likely to change.
When you show you care about their success, feedback becomes help—not punishment.
“Effective adults” is your shared job
Kristina also offered a powerful reframe: your job as a parent is to produce effective adults. Your job as a business leader is to produce effective adult employees.
At home, that’s training children through developmental stages. At work, adults are also developing—through learning, expectations, and feedback loops.
That doesn’t mean you treat adults like toddlers. It means you recognize the deeper truth: they’re still humans.
And humans don’t function well without trust, structure, and connection.
Why adults can be harder to lead than kids (and what to do about it)
One of the funniest (and most honest) parts of the conversation came from observing how behavior shows up across ages.
Kristina talked about seeing “adult temper tantrums” at work—behavior that mirrors what you’d usually expect from younger children.
But she also explained something real: behavior training is often harder with adults.
Why?
Adults are more set in their ways.
They have more history (and therefore more emotional triggers).
Feedback can land differently depending on mental headspace.
Kristina described it as a two-sided equation: even if you’re giving feedback with the right intent (“How do I help you?”), your effectiveness depends on how it’s received.
That’s where leadership and parenting connects again. Parenting teaches you to slow down and consider the relationship first. You don’t deliver correction in a vacuum—you deliver it with care, context, and trust.
In leadership, you do the same thing. You focus on connection so feedback becomes a tool for growth instead of a threat.
How to give feedback that actually works
Here’s the practical takeaway Kristina shared: when feedback is tied to connection and best interest, it becomes more effective.
It also helps to remember a simple leadership reality: if the person doesn’t believe you understand them—or believe you’re on their side—your feedback will rarely be accepted in the way you intended.
Instead of focusing only on what you want to say, build two things:
Trust (so people feel safe)
Open communication (so feedback flows both directions)
When you’re self-employed: feedback comes through your clients
Not everyone leads a team of employees. Many entrepreneurs are solopreneurs, freelancers, coaches, and consultants.
So what does leadership look like when you’re the only employee?
Kristina pointed out that for self-employed individuals, feedback often arrives indirectly—through what your clients tell you. That makes the feedback process less formal, but no less important.
Her advice was simple and surprisingly powerful: become excellent at asking questions.
Instead of assuming you understand what went wrong (or what clients “really mean”), ask:
What part of this was most useful?
What would make it better?
What outcome were you expecting?
Where did you feel stuck or unsure?
And underlying all of it is trust. Kristina explained that in her work she builds trust not only with the person she’s coaching, but also with their employees (when she’s working with organizations). Her point was clear: nobody wants to work with someone they don’t trust.
That extends into business marketing too. For example, Kristina compared trust in client relationships to trusting restaurant recommendations. If you trust the person making the suggestion, you’re more likely to take the next step.
In other words: your business success often follows the trust you build long before any sale.
Balance isn’t about perfect control—it’s about routines and habits
Let’s talk about the part everyone really wants to know: How do you balance life and business as a busy mom?
Kristina’s answer didn’t involve magic. It involved planning and routines—specifically small habits that create consistency.
Start with tiny habits (not a Monday-miracle plan)
Kristina mentioned she’s not the “best planner,” so she focused on building habits gradually. She described developing a morning routine over time and emphasized that the goal is to create a structure that supports your day, not a complicated system that collapses when life gets messy.
She shared examples of how her mornings work:
Exercise early
Some housework
Getting everyone ready
Waking kids and preparing lunches
She also referenced habit-building resources like Atomic Habits (which I've also read and highly recommend) and the 5am Club. The core idea was the same as the advice you’ll hear from almost every effective leadership coach: small changes compound.
And she made a point that’s worth repeating for anyone who keeps failing their own “new week” goals: if your plan depends on dramatic change, it often won’t last.
Kristina contrasted this with her own mindset: she doesn’t treat “today” as the start of 17 new things. She treats it as continuing what works and adjusting based on reality.
Do the hard thing first (and save the easy things for later)
Another practical leadership habit she uses: she’s productive in the morning and less so in the afternoon—so she schedules her hardest work first.
She also uses afternoon tasks to keep her motivated and reduce frustration—things that are either easy or enjoyable.
This matters because discipline doesn’t always come from willpower. It comes from designing your day around your energy patterns.
Weekly and daily planning beats “winging it”
Kristina described doing weekly planning and daily planning and structuring her day as much as possible. Even if her day doesn’t go perfectly, having a plan reduces the chaos that otherwise steals your momentum and often leads to procrastination.
When you hit a slump: what you do matters more than what happens
Entrepreneurship and motherhood are “roller coaster” realities. Kristina said one minute you feel like you’re on top of the world—and the next minute you wonder why you’re doing all of it. Which I also agree with, it doesn't matter how many kids you have, most mothers would agree that they feel like this sometimes.
So what helps her pump herself back up when the day turns?
Her answer included: Rest (a break is not a reward—it’s a reset)
Taking a walk
Reading something that reinvigorates her mind
Talking with her coach
Vent sessions with a friend or loved one
Reframing with the mindset: “I’ve done this before. I can do it again.”
That last one is a leadership skill too. When you lead others, you can’t only respond to pressure—you have to stay anchored in competence.
And she also applied the same logic to parenting. Sometimes you’re doing great, and then you yell—then you feel the guilt. Her approach is to reset and breathe, and lean into support from people who understand.
Her coach being a mom as well helped, because relating to the people you're learning from reduces shame and accelerates recovery.
Interconnection is real & Essential: your business and your family are not separate worlds
Some moms worry that involving their kids in business will distract them or blur boundaries. Kristina’s view was different.
She doesn’t run her life as “mom stuff” and “business stuff” in separate containers. Her kids are in her planning. Her job is part of her life, and her life is part of her job.
That means she considers things like:
A child’s birthday and gift planning
Appointments
Daycare pickup timing
Scheduling around family needs
To her, it’s not about letting kids “manage the business.” It’s about acknowledging that family logistics are also leadership logistics.
She also talked about communication in a realistic way: her family knows she works, but they don’t necessarily fully understand everything she does. That’s okay. They know “Mom works,” and they see her in the routine.
And she made a point that many remote workers relate to: kids notice your mood. If you’re stressed from work, they act up. They pick up tension and body language and “vibe” shifts.
That becomes a leadership advantage too: your emotional regulation influences outcomes, whether you’re leading a team, serving clients, or parenting at home.
How to build confidence as a business owner (using leadership skills)
Kristina’s work includes leadership training that helps people build behaviour change and confidence—skills that matter even if you don’t manage employees.
She explained that many solopreneurs use leadership training to improve their one-on-one interactions with clients. And those skills transfer directly into business outcomes:
Working with clients requires relationship skills.
Understanding needs must come before pushing a product.
Approach and communication style are part of the offer.
Confidence affects how you show up and how seriously clients take your value.
She also noted a common truth: people sense hesitation. If you’re not confident in who you are or the service you provide, it shows up in how you communicate.
And authenticity matters. Whether it’s kids at home or clients you’re trying to attract, you can feel when someone isn’t being genuine or when they’re holding something back.
Structure for your day: a real example you can adapt
Kristina’s daily structure is a good example of what “leadership through routines” looks like in real life—complete with the messiness we all have.
Her outline includes:
Getting up around 5:00am
A short YouTube workout (about 35 minutes)
Reading and praying
Unloading the dishwasher, getting breakfast, preparing kids’ lunches
Getting kids up and out
Arriving at a co-working space around 9:00am
Reviewing the plan for the day (and doing a longer weekly plan on Mondays)
Choosing one “hard thing” to tackle first
Doing easier tasks and phone calls during the day
Wrapping up around 4:30–5:00pm to grab the kids, then dinner and family routines
She also admitted she’s not perfectly consistent on every day. But she’s working on it—because consistency isn’t an all-or-nothing goal. It’s a direction.
This matters for leadership and parenting, because the “leadership” part isn’t just your schedule. It’s your willingness to keep adjusting without quitting.
Habits that support both leadership and parenting
Kristina said one of her most helpful habit changes this year involved alarms and routines. Her son (six) and her younger kids respond well to structure when expectations are consistent.
For example, when they get home:
Lunch pails & backpacks are unloaded
Reading happens
Relaxation and tablet time follow
For mornings, she added phone alarms like “wake them up now” and “get your boots on.” It reduced frustration—and it helped her kids learn to follow the flow.
That’s a parenting lesson, but it’s also a leadership lesson: systems support behavior. When people (kids or team members) know the routine, you spend less time debating and correcting in the moment.
She also made an important point about grace and progress:
If you miss a day, start again tomorrow.
Going from zero to a little is progress, not failure.
Habits take time to stick—sometimes longer than people assume.
So if your habit fails early in the month, it doesn’t mean the habit is wrong. It means it’s new—and new takes practice.
The “process” mistake: not following your own system
Kristina shared another mistake she made: she didn’t follow her own process. When she didn’t, business output suffered.
This is incredibly common for entrepreneurs—especially those who are juggling family, energy changes, and constant demands.
Her solution is to treat process like leadership infrastructure. She mentioned she follows a sales process outline (connected to her training) and that it works when she does it consistently.
Her business development included working on a cold calling and prospecting process and building daily habits around it—while acknowledging that certain weeks (like March break) disrupt routines.
That’s not an excuse. It’s a reality check. And it’s why habits need to be resilient, not rigid.
The leadership takeaway for entrepreneurs: build trust, then build systems
If you only remember one thing from this entire conversation, let it be this: leadership and parenting both succeed when trust and relationships come first—and then routines and habits support the relationship over time.
Here’s how that translates into business:
Trust is built by showing you understand people’s needs and acting with their best interest in mind.
Feedback works when it’s connected to relationship, not delivered like a weapon.
Consistency comes from small habits and predictable processes (not giant motivation bursts).
Confidence grows as you practice leadership behaviors and become more authentic in how you show up.
A practical “start here” plan (if you want to apply it this week)
If you’re reading this and thinking, “Okay, but where do I start?”—use the same small-step philosophy Kristina emphasized.
1) Pick one relationship-first habit
This can be as simple as improving how you ask questions or how you respond to client feedback.
When a client shares concerns, ask what outcome they were expecting.
Ask what would make the experience better.
Repeat back what you heard to confirm understanding.
2) Choose one routine that reduces daily friction
Think like a parent: what removes chaos?
Prepare lunches or plan meals once a week.
Use alarms for the steps that usually go sideways.
Do a short weekly plan to protect your time.
3) Define one “hard thing first” block
Don’t schedule your day based on hope. Schedule it based on energy.
Find the time you have the most mental clarity.
Use that time for your most important task.
Save easier or more enjoyable tasks for later.
4) Decide your definition of progress
Kristina emphasized grace: missed days don’t erase the habit. Consistency is a direction.
Even “zero to two” times per week counts.
The goal is to keep starting again.
FAQ: Leadership and Parenting—your questions answered
Are leadership and parenting really similar, or is that just motivational talk?
They’re genuinely similar because both are relationship-based human-development roles. The skills of building trust, setting expectations, practicing emotional regulation, and using feedback with care show up in both parenting and leadership. Kristina’s experience is that parenting skills often mirror what leadership coaching teaches: connection first, then behavior change through routines.
What if I feel guilty when work stress makes my kids act out?
Kristina pointed out that kids pick up on stress and “vibe” shifts, especially when parents are stressed at home. The practical move is to reset with rest, a break, and support (like talking with a coach, friends, or loved ones). You can also reduce stress by tightening routines—structure helps everyone.
How do I give feedback to clients or team members without it becoming tense?
Aim for connection and trust. Kristina’s guidance was that feedback lands differently depending on mental headspace and the relationship. Ask questions to understand what the other person is experiencing, and frame your feedback around their best interest—so it feels like help rather than judgment.
I’m a solopreneur—what does “leadership” mean if I don’t manage employees?
Leadership still applies because you lead through your one-on-one relationships with clients and customers. Kristina explained that leadership skills like understanding needs before recommending solutions, communicating clearly, and building trust directly improve your sales and client outcomes—even if you’re the only person running the business.
What’s the best way to build habits when I’m already overwhelmed?
Start with tiny, sustainable habits rather than trying to overhaul everything at once. Kristina recommended planning and routines built from small steps (like morning routines, weekly meal planning, alarms for key moments, and choosing one hard task early). Also, if you miss a day, start again the next day—progress is about consistency over perfection.
How do I get back on track after a slump?
Kristina emphasized rest and recovery: take a walk, read something reinvigorating, chat with a coach, or vent with supportive people. Another helpful mindset is to remember you’ve handled hard moments before and you can do it again. Slumps are normal—what matters is how quickly you reset and continue moving forward.
Is it okay if my schedule isn’t consistent every day?
Yes. Kristina admitted her routines aren’t perfectly consistent, especially with family life. The key is to keep the structure you can control (like a morning routine and a planned “hard thing” block) and adjust when disruptions happen (like school breaks). Leadership is direction, not flawless execution.
Final thought: You don’t have to choose between being a mom and being a leader
If motherhood has ever made you feel like your identity is shrinking into “multiple hats,” here’s a different perspective: you’ve been practicing leadership skills your whole life.
You didn’t start leadership when you opened a business. You started it every time you built routines, supported development, adjusted after missteps, and learned how to connect with another human being under pressure.
So instead of treating leadership and parenting like two competing roles, treat them like two classrooms. The parenting classroom helps you build the trust and emotional intelligence leadership needs. The leadership classroom helps you design systems and confidence that make home life easier too.
And when the day goes messy—and it will—remember Kristina’s core message: don’t treat every slip like a failure. Treat it like data. Rest, reset, and start again tomorrow.
Connect with Kristina
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